Month: November 2016

Reflection……

Regina Phalange

Over the past few days I have found reflection in so much around me. I needed to express about.. You know rage on the page.

This will be the first year, in many, many years I will be alone. Not literally, but without my stations, my little mini me, my most dear best friend and her little stations, my other great friends, my family (my immediate family live in Iowa, Wisconsin, California, Texas, Florida, Minnesota). This year my close stations, my family………… will not be around to give thanks with each other. As I reflect on that I think about what I could do, what I might do, what I want to do, mostly what I can do……. No…….. you won’t find me having a lonesome pitty party. No…………. not to sit at home under a cozy blanket and over indulge on NetFlix and consume what I could say more Vodka/Tonics/3 Limes then I ever would or want to…..

However that is not what is going to happen.

In my life I find myself being still……a lot………. Meaning…… I know to gather all the information before reacting. I know to just listen… I know when to lead a helpful banter…. I know when someone needs someone…. Simply to just help….. Yes I put myself out there……. Never expecting anything in return….. I do this because I want to…  It helps me to be still…. To reflect on what is in front of me. It’s for one person’s benefit…Mine.. I find peace, understanding and a great sense of being still… Reflection……

I am pretty sure most of us do not think about reflection in helping others. As a means to being still.. Letting that feeling of being able to just put yourself out there to assist one person who at that moment can’t find it in themselves to just be still….

Here is what I know…. I am so Thankful that people allow me to help them, assist them, listen to them, be there for them, as I can, do and want to……

Try it………….

 

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Keep putting yourself out there…….

Regina Phalange

Don’t stop. No matter what scenario you are in, feel, express, share, mostly Live….. Never stop……

Put yourself out there. It’s part of what we need to do, to feel as humans. That no matter who, where, when we share it with. We at the very least can and NEED to share. NO one should judge us otherwise.  Do not settle in life.. Sometimes we find ourselves in a predicament as we did once upon a time ago. And fear what our peers think of us. It’s human  nature to want to share with someone what we are going through. And it not be about drama, but it is about life…LIVING….. What we are as individuals,………………… go through as humans….LIFE..LIVING…. it’s not drama.. See it for what it is… LIFE…..LIVING…

We have to believe in ourselves on many levels to see our best potential. What saddens me most, is when I see friends now, those of the past, potential good friends in the future, is that there is judgement…always….never……ending…judgement. How about we all just learn a better way of being still…Letting ourselves believe what you feel inside…If you just believe…. You to can find what truly feels good….. Who you are…And what and WHO you want to be.

Here is what I know…….Don’t loose site of who you are… For anyone…ever….. You have always been liked. You will….Always will be. Liked..

… Never forget that……

 

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The Wonder of it All!

Regina Phalange

The Wonder of it All………..

People’s minds, thought process, way of being…. I’m always taking that in. Not so much wondering, just pondering these things. What makes us tick? What makes us think the way we think and why? Is it those who surround us? Is it where we are at the moment? Is is simply our mindset and that is who we are?

Let me explain, recently a good friend of mine found herself challenged with a rage of emotions, ups, downs, a basic shit storm in her life (career, friends, partner, children, an ex, etc). What she pondered the most from it all was that she doesn’t like being alone, and is afraid that is where she is going to end up. Alone.
Aren’t we all afraid of that? Of course, but we can’t let that hinder the possibly of  what lies ahead for us. She is someone who needs to have someone in her life, she doesn’t want it, she needs it. Now we all know our needs and our wants, or do we? Sometimes our judgement gets clouded because of something that happens in our life, bam we are off the track. Some are able to get back on the track. Others just can’t muster the ability to jump back on, it’s to challenging, it’s to difficult, it’s to much for them to handle. Before they know it, their entire life is a shit storm with no end in site, no light at the end of the tunnel. Lost…….alone…..afraid………….

Prioritize, make a list, figure out what you can do now… What do you have control of…… Surprisingly more then we think we do. We just have to believe in ourselves….

I want to at times take her little shoulders and shake her just a little, to see if anything will reconnect again. However I know the best thing for her, is for her to figure it out herself. All I can do is tell her what I know…

So here is what I know… we have to take the challenges, the ups, the downs, the shit storms, that present themselves in our lives and run with them.  Ride the wave, none of us has a crystal ball, we cannot see into future. We can only hope, and take every moment given to us and ride the wave it has become. Stop being afraid of the storm, look it right in the face, don’t let it shake you down. You will come out of it brighter then you can imagine!

 

 

 

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Why can’t we just get along?

Regina Phalange

Why can’t we just get along? Friends, Men, Women, Children, what not.. why can’t we just get along?.. Why is it that so many just can’t keep it real??

Life is about moving forward and towards something for ourselves.  That’s where it all has to start. So then why do people feel their judgement in our lives is important? Are they walking in our shoes? Are they living our life? I don’t think so. Yet so many feel it’s OK to infringe their so called guidance into our lives. Without us even asking for it. STAND BACK and STEP ASIDE, you aren’t walking in their shoes. Quite honestly if they were, most couldn’t handle it, why? Simple……….. it’s not what they are used too.  So why even go there?

I mean if there is something that really bothers you about someone, what they say, how they do business, who they are friends with, or what ever….  Just be adult and speak your mind. Be mindful, be gracious, be decent about it. Keep your facts simple, to the point and most of all, keep it real…….This is what we call sharing… Guess what…….It’s OK to share, really it is. Why bottle it up, why hold it all in? For what……???????………………… for it to fester and boil over ? No…no… and no….  Aren’t we better if we share? Yes, yes, yes… We are humans, we have emotions, it’s instinct to talk a talk, but it’s human to share…..No matter what the outcome being open, honest and sharing you can feel good about the you, that you are! REAL!!!

Here is what I know…. Share……….Try it, see how it feels. Trust me you will be a better person. You will feel good about who you are.  You will be able to look yourself in the mirror honestly and know you are keeping it real…..always……….

 

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Noise, Noise, Noise……..

Regina Phalange

Once upon a time ago it was quite….Then BAM came the Noise, Noise, Noise….

Let me explain… Boy Noise! Yes Boy equals Noise….. When you least expect it. They come out of the woodwork.. You show who you are to them right out of the gate. As you should, why hold off? Don’t!..You need to keep it real, always keep it real!……..

Herein is the problem with them, not you……They feel and think something better is going to come along, or that the grass is greener on the other side of the fence…. And….They do have one of many different ways to check out from you….. Maybe he’s that guy who just leaves. Maybe he’s that guy that halts all contact. Maybe he’s that guy that strings you along. Maybe he’s that guy…………..so on and so on and so on…….

Here is the kicker…. They ALL come back.. At some point, they all come back. Once they realize they had a good thing, and you were and are truly amazing, they kick themselves quietly. They stop and think, how can get back into her good graces to even open up conversation again… Hummmm.. Let’s play this out, they suggest they freaked out.. Why because perhaps you paid attention, completely paid attention to the details he shared with you and you showed him in some way that you did indeed paid attention to detail. Or the reason he halted all contact was because he wasn’t sure you shared the same interests. Or maybe there wasn’t a connection. Maybe he strung you along because he just wasn’t sure what he wanted. BLAH BLAH BLAH…

Whatever the case may be, haven’t we all heard it before. Every excuse in the book.

But stop…..When you are trying to understand this all a sudden comes the noise, noise, noise… It’s not just one reaching back out, but all a sudden those you might have meet a year or 2 ago, seemed to resurface… It’s not just 2, but 4, 5 even 6 at once.. NOISE, NOISE, NOISE…What the heck we think to ourselves. Flattering as it may seem, what do they want. I’ll tell you what they want. What they should have realized was there the entire time, the AWESOME YOU that you are! Overlooked it my ass, freaked out…..whatever, I didn’t know what I wanted, get over yourself already…  Bottom line is it’s NOISE, NOISE, NOISE and no one has time for that.

Here is what I know………Don’t loose site of who you are because you hope so badly he’ll come around….  He will eventually, they all COME BACK. Just keep this in mind, when he does come back, you will be stronger knowing this about yourself. You and only you will be able to decide if he’s worth the second chance. And this time around make it all about you!

 

 

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